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13 December 2008 @ 11:20 pm
Valkyrie movie review: FOR THE LOVE OF---  


wangstbig.png picture by OperaticXingenue

Apparently, not even epic amounts of wangst and Cruise's bitchin' eye patch and save this film...


http://emanuellevy.com/search/details.cfm?id=12037


"[A] glitzy and shallow picture that pays little attention to psychology, motivation, characterization, and broader political context [...] Arguably miscast, Cruise is stiff and unconvincing as the courageously heroic German officer.  He speaks with a distinctly American accent, though early on, he utters a few sentences in German
(SERIOUSLY?? GERMAN? DAMN I'VE GOT TO GO WATCH THIS MOVIE.).  Making things worse is the fact that Cruise is surrounded by a distinguished supporting cast of English thespians (Tom Wilkinson, Kenneth Branagh, Eddie Izzard, Terence Stamp), who speak in English accent.  Then there are some officers who speak with a touch of German accent, and actors like the Dutch Carice van Houten (who plays Stauffenberg's wife) and German actor Thomas Kretschmann [...] The whole production takes a wrong, overly stylized (neo-noir), approach to a theme that should have been treated with more respect to facts, events, and especially characters as they form and change coalitions within the army [...] Forced to wear a black eye-patch and a prosthetic arm, he is still amazingly adept at conducting all kinds of physical activities, some of which quite complicated, as it becomes clear when Stauffenberg himself plants the bomb in Hitler's sheltered headquarters. (LOL EYE PATCH ASDJFKL;! I READ IN ANOTHER REVIEW THAT CRUISE DOES A NAZI SALUTE WITH A PROSTHETIC ARM BWAHAHAHAHA!)"


I'm sorry for being irreverent. it's just that this movie is already full of SO much hilarity. I CAN'T WAIT FOR IT!!!
 
 
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( Post a new comment )
rickybee[info]rickybee on December 14th, 2008 12:17 pm (UTC)
Pic Cruises for Bruises
The producers should have cut their losses and got the actor to fit the role and not the other way round. I would imagine Zellweger would have shone in this picture . .
operaticingenue: Rinat Shaham: Carmen[info]operaticingenue on December 14th, 2008 05:52 pm (UTC)
Re: Pic Cruises for Bruises
I hadn't thought about that but now that you mention it, I would've loved to see her in this movie. She always does so well in period movies. Not to mention, one hell of an actress.
rickybee[info]rickybee on December 14th, 2008 06:35 pm (UTC)
Re: Pic Cruises for Bruises
Yes. As I was typing in originally, it struck me, too; though the last time TC gave her a leg-up, she stole the show: THAT'S not going to happen again, I think. For all his much-vaunted professionalism, TC should learn that filmsets are not just huge G.I. Joe bases for his ego to play with - there is no way in a thousand years that he fits the bill for the part. With the exception of aforementioned J.Maguire (and, to be honest, W.o.t.World's effects), I find it hard to manage a second viewing of any of poor Tom's work.
dangerousdame[info]dangerousdame on December 14th, 2008 05:51 pm (UTC)
But...Kenneth! And Eddie Izzard! Surely that must be worth something!
operaticingenue: FUCK![info]operaticingenue on December 14th, 2008 05:54 pm (UTC)
I knooooow. But yeah, they're definitely one of the few reasons why I'm going to see this one.

Kenneth = ♥ :D
feel_the_loff[info]feel_the_loff on December 14th, 2008 08:35 pm (UTC)
I just don't take Tom Cruise seriously. I have to say, hilarious as this movie sounds, I feel badly for the Germans. They already hated the casting of their national hero, and now the movie just plain sucks.
operaticingenue: Kiri: Manon Lescaut[info]operaticingenue on December 14th, 2008 08:38 pm (UTC)
Same here. They've already got SO much war guilt. X_X
 
 

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